The Pub: No. 2 but still trying

The Pub may seem like a longtime
Grinnell institution, but in reality, the
dn~campus hangout has been around
for less than a decade.

Seven years ago this fall, SGA first
explored the possibility oi an on-
campus bar where students could go
for a beer and engage in conversation
in a relaxing atmosphere.

SGA worked hard to bring this Vi-
sion to reality. They wrote trustees,
held a referendum in which 64% of the
student body approved the concept or
a pub, and worked out potential
hassels with the administration. Alter
receiving the college’s olIiClal ap-
proval, SGA ran into trouble with
longdead J.B. Grinnell, the school‘s
founder. SGA found that the deeding
of Grinnell's land included a provision
stating that if alcohol were ever sold
on his land, the land would revert
back to his heirs. However, luckily {or
thousands of Grinnell students, the
Pub's location in the iormer PDRs oi
Gardner Lounge was not affected
because the land was not deeded by

Grinnell.

After an initial $1000 loan from the
college and the remodeling oi . ' ‘in
basement, the Pub opened in outiber
oi 1973 during Alumni Woekend Slur
dent enthusiasm and nlucll tall are
greeted its inception, l-Ioweiil. Chiel
Bill Peters ol' the Grilinell Police
Department remarked the Pub would
he a “howling success” for a montllv
but after that, sludents would become
bored. Needless to say, that hasn't
been the case.

The 1973 prices featured draws tor
only 30 cents and pitchers only $1 25, a
big jump from the present 50 cent
draws and $2.00 pitchers,

Presently, the Pub, a nonproiit core
pnration, transacts approximately
$47,000 worth of business annually.
although it rarely breaks even when
profits are made, they are reinvested
back into the corporation.

The Pub is run this year by co-
managers Tom Kozal and Cathy
Gillls. Twentyrlive students are
employed and their jobs range from
keeping the establisment clean to scrr

ving students 25 kegs 1337 gallons) of
brew a week. This consumption oi
beer is not unnoticed by the Anheuseiu
Busch Corporation in st. Louis, The
Pub is Grinnell Bauerage's best
customer and one or the two largest
consumers Oi Budweiser in Iowa.

BeSldes serving beer, the Pub also
promotes entertainment, featuring
about 24 musical performances a
year.

Because of its heavy use, the Pub
does receive a ialr quantity oi abuse
One worker attributes the damage to
customers who go Ihere and take out
their lrustrations This damage ranges
from students who use the sinks as
toilets, to persons who lek holes in
the walls, to those individuals who
steal anything that is not nailed down,
other problems include general
rowdiness and underage people who
attempt to sneak in.

The Pub's most prolitable times are
Friday Happy Hour and Friday night,
But Koznl’s tavorlte time Is 3:00 a.m
any night of the week

bill kowalski "

Was Einstein as nice as they said?

Though it's been over 20 years
since his death, Albert Einstein is still
making the news. From the cover of
Time magazine to the “What's
Quackin" section of Ducks Divine, the
mostrecent storia have concerned
electricity, the theory of relativity,
and catnaps. After reading one too
many of the sugar-coated biographies,
I decided to take matters into my own
hands: There had to be another side to
this genius. Oh sure, Einstein dressed‘
slovenly, even smelled a bit, but all of
this just added to his popularity as
”the absentrminded professor l" ‘;
decicl ed to find out aboutgsinstein's ,
failures. I decided to'make an appoint-
ment with destiny.

Destiny resided in a small home in
Princeton, New Jersey, in the person
of one Professor Squeamish McDufi.
McDuff, an old colleague of Einstein‘s,
was as blithering at the age of 93 as he
was said to have been in his youth. He
had-worked with Einstein up until
theirjexperiments with electricity and
electromagnetism began, but their
partnership dissolved after McDuff ex-
perienced a nightmare that was to
change his life,

He explains: “I went to sleep one
night after washing my hair. The in-
evitability of catching a headcold
weighed heavily on my mind. As I
slept,_l dreamt of a device whlch blew
warm air out of a nozzle. I named it

the ‘hairwarmer,’ though in the dream
the term ‘lunchbox' had an unex-
plainable appeal. 1 realized upon wake
ing that I had envisioned the forerun-
ner of the modern hairdryer, but since
I was used to wearing my hair in a
ducktail, I discarded the dream as
nonsense and returned to sleep.

“I dreamt that I was sitting in the
Lincoln Tunnel surrounded by giant
sausage links complaining about their
electric bills I determined that I
would have to take drastic measures il
l were to escape unscathed. Motioning
to the north end of the tunnel I cried,
‘What’s that?!’ and began imitating
the sound or grease being poured into
a hot skillet. The sausages went crazy.
They left without ‘ Word of farewell. I
exited the tunnel through the north
end; and came upon a land inhabited
by lealy green vegetables. They were
rejoicing at my appearance,

“When Iarose the next morning, l
bid Einstein iarewell, and began my
research. i decided that it was my
responsibility to prove that chicory,
escarole, and other green vegelablos
not only served to dress up a salad.
but could function as meaningful
members oi society as well. l
liberated vegetables irom super
markets by the bushel. Though most
were run over by trucks in the street,
or were just left in the gutter to rot, I
still feel this was my greatest

triumph.”

I nodded amlably, and reminded
lvlcouit about the purpose oi my visit
He muttered something about a scrap-
book and motioned me to follow him
into his den

in5ide. a large green album lay on
the Coffee table. “Einstein's Bunr
gling” it was entitled, and something
about it reeked of 'ust the information
I needed, My hunc about McDuII was
right. He was still very bitter about
the outcome of his scientific career.
Einstein went on to world lame,
MCDuIl to ridicule. No one considered
McDuif's work to be or any imporr
tance (Einstein himseli was quoted as
saying McDuII’s independent study
with vegetables amounted to “an over-
shoe filled with pus”) McDull' was
just the source I was looking for. He

Scarlet 8. Block,

 

