./

Scarlet and slack photo by no“ Mikey

Senior .leii Reed relaxes arter clocking a 53.9 good for third place, in
the 100 iree style, it was Reed‘s last home meet.

New Director
'ReceivesBirthduy
Computer Coke

Student workers at Grinnell's Com-
puter Center decided that new dis
rector James McDonald shouldhave
3 special cake for his birthday,

So, with the cooperation ot Han-
sen's Danish Maid Bakery, they had
a three-layer cake in the exact
shape and color of a data process»
ing card, baked.

Ellen Bouma, a programmer can-
sultant at the center, Said the cakes
icing was even colored to closely
match the drab manilla oi' the stan-
dard punch card.

Bouma said the bakery’s sales-
people were amused when the stu-
dents ordering the cake used an
electronic calculator to figure out

the precise dimensions at the cake.
Using dark brown icing, the baker
even produced the small punched
holes on the cake which, if read

by an electronic card sorter, would
have spelled out “Happy Birthday
Jim McDonald.”

“We took in a data card and told
them we wanted a cake just like it.
By the time we were finished fig-

uring out exactly how big we want—
ed it, the bakery people were in
absolute hysterics.”

Besides Bouma, Carol Cieigh, an
operator at the center, and David
Renaud, a programming assistant,
were involved in planning the cake
and subsequent surprise party,
which was attended by aboutadozen
people,

The group got the idea for the cake
after McDonald mentioned that co-
workers at Morningside College,
where he was director of the com-
puter center, had made him a plasr
ter oi paris cake in the shape or
a data card last year

FIGHTING SEXISM'
KALAMAZOO, ,MI—-Students who
think their professors are making
sexist remarks in class or using
sexist text material can obtain a
special term to send the proiessor
by writing: AWMS Status of Women
Commission, Student Services Bu-
ilding, Western Michigan Univer-

sity, Kalamazoo, MI 49001.

/

‘ by Tom Knapp

Selected Bulletins, Grinnell Inter-
national News Service

Feb. 15 Citing studies showing cold
water reduces speed or oil tankers,
all major U.S. oil companies ann—
ounce 135% increases on all distilr
late products. Also promise to con-
tinue to serve nation in its hour
oi need.

Feb. 21 Wall Street Journal relea-
ses paper showing proiits ior the
first month oi 1974 by major Oil
companies have increased oy1073.
7%. Spokesman for newly iormed
Save Oil companies Everywhere
(SOCE) yustiiies proiits as necesse
ary tor new exploration attempts,
chiefly in the area of Jupiter and
Saturn.
Feb. 26 Senator Henry Jackson de-
nounces invidious generational dis—
crimination, and calls ior priceroll
back to 1954 level, in the name of
equality for all Americans of all
times.

Mar. 3 Gasoline now at 793C per
gallon on black market, The AAA
announces that there are currently
3 stations still selling at govern—
ment established levels 0128c. Two
are in Southern Arkansas, and one
in Utah. Senators Jackson and Ch»
urch denounce the black market
as inequitable and demand Federal
allocation of all interstate black
market gasoline.

Mar. 17 Amid riots on Eastern
Seaboard, Senators Jackson and
Mondale submit bill to nationalize
all oil companies into the Federal
Oil Company oi the United states
(FOCUS) Later, after publication
of latest Gallup Presidential Preir
erence Poll for 1976, Senator Jackv
Son demands that Mondale remove
his name from bill. Mondale im-

THE GRINNELL SCARLET l: BLACK FEBRUARY 15, 1974 PAGE

Coming Attractions

mediately submits his own legis-
lation calling for a National Oil
Company of the United States (NO»
CUS) which, in his words, “is su-
perior legislation to anything now
on the floor.” He also knncks any
signiiicance to Gallup survey show,
ing him neck and neck with Senator
Jackson [or second placein 76 Dem-
ocratic nomination.

April 16 Pros, Nixon signs FOCUS
legislation, and re-expresses his
faith in the free enterprise system.

—
Rhetoric .
Unlimited

April 20 FOCUS announces allocar
tion oi gas by area. Riots break out
in L.A. where 12 Stations are al-
lowed to sell gas. Meanwhile, in
Tin Lick Nevada, construction st

arts on 15 new stations, Adminis-
trator apologizes to families 01 riot
victims, and explain that 1930 cen-
sus statistics were inadvenantly
used ior allocation formula,

April 23 Admitting that any new
governmental project can anticipate
problems, rocus administratorde—
nies allegation or gross waste, “All
ter all, how were we to know those
oil rigs we put in the gulf wouldn’t
ﬂoat."

May 2 FOCUS asks Congress ior
6 billion dollars in supplemental
appropriations tn bringpay schedule
up to government standards. Admin—
istrator gives reason that legisla-
tion called for all persons employed

Should A Gentleman Oller A Valentine To A lady?

“Valentine’s Day used to be fun,”
lamented John Porter. “but now
Pauline is so damned liberated it’s
impossible." John Porter sat there
shivering as it he were seated on
a block of ice. ”When 1 met her
she was a quiet little girl of seven-
teen who 1 really liked. Now she's
a big, bad, bodacious women’s lib-
ber. Now I think maybe sometimes
we’re enemies."

“No, John you don't understand.
When Women liberate themselves
they will understand themselves her
tter and will thereby be able to help
their men cope with the world."

DEE/MD {it

BEANS
TitlihitdS

“But do they have to beat us into
the ground in order to help us,"
John countered. “That’s the only
way,” I answered. "No one has
ever had their lreedom given them
without their lervent Conscientious
often, without sweat and sometimes
blood being shed. I didn’t hear you
complain back in ’57. In iact, you
were not at all upset by the idea
oi helping whitey by lighting him.
You were right out there on Main
Street with Martin. You can’t say

 

one shouldn’t push for ones rights.”

“No, I'm not saying that. 1 don't
disagree with their goal. What 1
don’t agree with are the tactics
they think they have to use. Pau-
line tells me one of the goals of
Women’s Liberation is sexual in,
dependence. That’s scarey.” “But
don’t we as black people want
economic independence so that we
won’t get screwed all time any
more?” I returned.

“Yes,” he said, “but there the
string breaks. Suppose all the black
people in this country decided one
day just to pick up and leave. No
body white would die from the pain.
Some would even breathe a sigh of
relief. But it just one woman, if
Pauline were to leave me,myworld
would cease to tunction tor a long
time. How can I liberate her, how
can 1 tree her when 1 am absolute-
ly dependent on her, while she is
so essential to my well»being7 Tell
me and 1’11 do it." '

“J.P.,” l answered. “you’ve got
to understand this. Women are not
trying to separate themselves lrom
men. They simply want to deiine
themselves as human beings. They
no longer want to define themselves
thru their children or husbands.
They no longer want to be tied to
their homes. They want to go into
the world and be fulﬁlled."

John looked around ourwarehouses
and surveyed our i'ellow drones.
Then he turned to me with a per,
ceptible swagger and said, ”Men
are outside the home all the time,
how many do you know to be ful—

Hours: 7 am]. to 11 p.m.
Hwy. 6 West, Grinnell

VISIT OUR DELI AND BAKERY

A Helpful Smile In Every Aisle!

E HAVE THE FRESHEST FRUIT AND VEGETABLES IN TOWN

 

filled?” 1 just sort of sat there ,
mesmerized. it was along moment
and iinally 1 uttered the only idiot
reply possible, “Santa Claus?”
With a trace ota grin he rose, “I
guess that I'm going to get Pauline
a Valentine anyway. lil don’t get
her one, in he in the dog house,
if I do I’m a male chauvinist pig
or whatever tor not recognizing
her equality. Women are a rips
off.”

”Tth is the iirst thing we’ve
agreed on all day,” i said, “But
John, I think you've been brainr
washed." ’
“Then that’s another thing we've
agreed on,” he said, “becausel
also think you are brain-washed,”

FRIDAY 8r. SATURDAY /
Oakland Acres Goli Club

Hwy. 6 w., Grinnell
Phone 2364527

by oil companies to be offered job
with FOCUS. ”You'd have payroll
problems too, if you had 87 score

taries tor each executive. Congres

also approves gas hike to 75 cents.
May 15 FOCUS asks Congress ior
312 billion to hi

to coordinate acti ties of Shundr I
thousand administrators.

May 26 Gas prices to 95 cents.
FOCUS asks Congress ior $8 billion
to hire liason officials to check on
20 thousand liason oﬂicials hired to
check on 6 hundred thousandadmin-
istrators. Senator Jacksonsaidtobe
considering legislation to solve
“this rotten mess.”

June 2 Gasoline production down
my, in iirst six months according
to Wall Street Journal. Texasleg-
islators draft plan to secede from
Union. Kansas and Oklahoma re-
fuse to allow interstate shipment
of their petroleum products. FOCUS
administrator downplays problems,
calling them temporary adjustment
problems which can easily be solved
it Congress will supply 22 billion
dollars for modernization of FOCUS
ofﬁces. Meanwhile Congressman
John Richards (Dem, N.Y.) oi the
FOCUS operations committee an-
nounces that searches for oil on
Long Island were with the exception
or three gas lines, largely'unsuc-
cessful. Asks Congress ior $10
million to ‘pay exploration royalties
tees to certain New York property
owners.

June 10 FOCUS announces neces-
sity of 3 day week for all but
12 million FOCUS employees asgas
production drops. Texas, La, Okla-
homa, Kansas, and Alaska announce
their secession from the union and
announce plans ior federation.

June 19 Arter gas production com
tinues to drop, FOCUS announces
new zero day work week for all,
Americans except 17 million FOCUS
workers.

July 7 Alter determining that FOCUS
workers are producing less gas
than they are using to get to work,
Chief administrator asks Congress
for $25 million torpay raises so
that employees may buy economy
cars.

July 1!! Wire services go myster-
iously dead as Senator Jackson de-
mands a Federal supervisoryngeu-
cy to oversee FOCUS.

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